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Monday, May 02, 2005

The Great Crime?

There seems to be a flurry of blogging trashing those of us who went away for Pesach. Most significantly the very recently retired MOChassid, with some weighing in by Marvin Schick and an article by Batsheva Marcus here.
My take is this:
I can understand how the thought of spending an obscene amount of money for one of the luxury programs where you get five-star acommodations and service can irritate those who spend weeks cleaning for Pesach.
I can grasp that the thought of kosher l'Pesach pina coladas poolside in between the four gourmet meals a day can seem like it's a bit much to those who spend much of Pesach chained to their ovens.
I can see why having the kids in a full day camp can seem like overkill to those who may feel like the walls of their house are closing in on them after eight days with their own kids and probably quite a few neices and nephews.

What I cannot for the life of me understand is how going away for Pesach became the great sin of Passover 5765.

People go away for Pesach. Most programs are not super-luxurious, some go to apartments and cook themselves anyway(that's us), and yes, there are even those who DO spring for the aforementioned five-star treatment. Some go away because they work full-time all year, take a week off for Pesach anyway, and make a family vacation out of it. Some go away because they come from very large families that have no other way to spend yom tov all together. Some go away because their parents ask them to and that is reason enough. And yes, there ARE some who go away simply for conspicuous consumption.

SO WHAT.

Get over it. Is it jealousy? Is it fear for the souls of those who go away? Have we worked on every other one of our middos that this is all that is left? Spending Pesach away from home?

Deal, people.

16 Comments:

Blogger AMSHINOVER said...

so when your kids have no clue what pesach is supposed to mean,when the seder becomes a show of wealth of the joneses,when gluttones modes of feeding frenzies with the chevra are all your kids will have as mesorah(and what a right wing fanatic in yeshiva told them)then you will know the sin.pesach is about teaching our kids that's all it is.so mom what your kids learn?

6:11 PM  
Anonymous shoshanna said...

Mom, this is interesting because I do feel that this Yom Tov there was a lot of bashing of the whole "going away for Pesach thing". I have to admit I was bashing along with the rest. Maybe I am jealous of the whole luxury thing while I was cooking and cleaning. I'll think about waht you said.

6:12 PM  
Blogger orthomom said...

Amshi, I think that's a bit much. Do you rail on anyone who doesn't raise their kids the same way you do in every arena? You may choose to raise your kids however you would like, but that remains YOUR decision. Last I checked, the GOP hasn't taken that right away from us yet.
And about the gluttony, bar mitzvahs and weddings have gotten out of hand as well. People drive expensive cars, and build expensive homes. Deal. Keeping up with the Joneses is not a middah that we Jews should try to emulate.
Try not to covet thy neighbor's seder, Amshi.

6:20 PM  
Blogger AMSHINOVER said...

mom,
if you post and leave space for comments you will get opinions,surprise!
me mrs's wanted to go to the chevra this year,but instead we went to woodmere.we could have stayed in the lap of gluttony,but we chose the over crowded accomodations of family and mesorah.
just call'em like i seez 'em
and you iz feeling guilty sez me.

6:43 PM  
Blogger AMSHINOVER said...

when going away is condemned it is usally in reference to hotels,what you and your family did was not the behavior frowned upon
BTW,
tell me again how this doesn't remind you of nazism
http://video.msn.co.il/video/default.aspx?g=9bf8af25-841a-4ac2-9885-200c4ac95ca8

6:56 PM  
Blogger orthomom said...

I know that Amshi, and my post isn't about me being defensive. I just don't think that going away - even to the fabulous programs - is the big crime. The people that don't care about a meaningful seder are the same people that don't understand what shabbos is all about either. They are usually the people that always have company or eat out and seat all the kids in the kitchen so the adults can "talk" (gossip). They don't get it, but those people are not gonna learn anything by staying home. And the people who care, will have a meaninful seder whether they cook and clean themselves or not.

7:02 PM  
Blogger Kiki said...

Pesach and every other Jewish holiday and/or tradition is yet another chance to teach the kids, let them learn from us. Lessons can be taught, examples shown, not matter where you are. Going away to a five star hotel for Pesach in order to have a nice relaxed holiday with the family - maybe that shows the kids that Mom and Dad worked so hard this year raising kids and at their jobs that they deserve a holiday where they can relax. Why shouldn't that be over Pesach?

I plan to take the whole family to Israel next year for pesach, to stay at a hotel. Am I spoiled? No, I am saving every penny I can, working hard, as is my husband so that we can go and spend the holiday in our country, with our family for once in our lives. Soemthing that may not be repeated for a long time to come.

Before people "Pesach Vacation" bash, look in your own backyards. The weddings you made, the barmitzvahs, britot etc.... Religion comes from within, and that's what I want my kids to know.

7:04 PM  
Blogger orthomom said...

Thank you Kiki.

7:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think I would have to agree with your way of thinking, especially the way you put it.

12:35 AM  
Blogger DovBear said...

Wherever you went did you run into Godol Hador? Hmmm... maybe you are Godol Hador? Lord knows he has plenty of time for another blog ;)

9:39 PM  
Blogger Chaim said...

Amshi, Like the situation isnt just as bad at people's own homes from Monsey to Boro Park to Williamsburgh, everyone showing off thier fanciest most expensive silver, the 300 dollar robes, who made more food, more interesting dishes, who has the most family at the table for the seder, who eneded the latest, who is more crazy nuts machmir, who is more frum, who is remodeling thier house instead of cleaning it. Who bought a new viking stove/fridge for pesach this year .. ? :-) Amshi I love your comments as always, but the showing off of thier wealth is just as bad at thier homes as it is at the hotels.

12:09 PM  
Anonymous orthodoc said...

Yes, Pesach vacations are expensive, but people have the right to spend their own money as they please. Those who rail against going away probably would do so if they could. You can have a meaningful Seder in a hotel--it's up to you. "Reverse snobbism" is jealousy.

9:51 PM  
Anonymous orthodoc said...

Yes, Pesach vacations are expensive, but people have the right to spend their own money as they please. Those who rail against going away probably would do so if they could. You can have a meaningful Seder in a hotel--it's up to you. "Reverse snobbism" is jealousy.

9:51 PM  
Anonymous orthodoc said...

Yes, Pesach vacations are expensive, but people have the right to spend their own money as they please. Those who rail against going away probably would do so if they could. You can have a meaningful Seder in a hotel--it's up to you. "Reverse snobbism" is jealousy.

9:51 PM  
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