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Wednesday, February 14, 2007

OM Gets Shoveler's Shoulder

Residents of my area were the lucky recipients today of three or so solid inches of falling ice. Aside from the unpleasantness of spending 10 minutes in driving ice pellets and sub-zero wind chills de-icing my car, the roads were a mess. My anti-lock brakes kicked in at almost every time I brought the car to a stop, and whenever I got out of my car for more than a few minutes I had to repeat the de-icing procedure. Also? The boots that came with a tag attached that read WATERPROOF? Yeah, right. Or at least I don't think the manufacturer meant the being-submerged-in-a-six-inch-deep-puddle-of-slush type of waterproof.

And take my advice - if and when some guy knocks at your door offering to shovel for a fee? In a storm like today's, when the ground just looks like it's blanketed in white fluffy snow - but is, in actuality, covered in a crunchy shell of compacted frozen snow over a hard layer of ice (that may seem to be redundant, but trust me, today I discovered that there is a real difference between the consistencies of those two forms of frozen water)? Take those guys offering to shovel up on their offer. No amount of money is too much for shoveling a mess like today's out of the way. And to be frank, shoveling is simply the wrong term for what was actually the act of hacking up 3-inch-thick ice and then scraping it out of the way. Let's just say that I was shocked to find that the term "shoveler's shoulder" got zero google hits.

Not all I'd hoped the season's first significant snowfall would be.


Blogger Jacob Da Jew said...

Nasty, Nasty weather. We got very few customers in the store.

9:46 PM  
Blogger and so it shall be... said...

I've been waiting for this day to come for a year and a half.

It all began when I needed to chop some roots out of my backyard. I went to home Depot, and bought an ax that was too light and short and this shovel/ax/chopper kind of tool. It's like a shovel that has a blade on the end instead of a scooper shovel thingie.

Well, none of the items I bought that day were able to hack those roots. Very disappointing. But, I figured, one day we'll get one of those unbearable icestorms, and I'll be glad to have my shovel/ax/chopper thing to break up all the ice on my steps and front walk. Well, today was the day!

For $150, I'll be glad to drop in to hack up your icy walk. Are you in?

9:47 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Hehe. Just be happy you're not in the Midwest...! :)

10:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Us snowboard and skiiers are rejoycing.

12:17 AM  

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